Modesty + Virtue = BEAUTIFUL

What are the normal thoughts that go through a women's or a girl's mind as they are deciding what to wear everyday. I would think most of these thoughts would be along the lines of  "Is this going to help me fit in?", "Does it look good on me?", "Am I going to look better or worse than others?", "What will others think about this outfit?", "I hope this outfit helps me get noticed by the opposite sex.", etc. I would dare say that not very often do thoughts such as, "Is this outfit going to feed into the astronomical problem that so many people are struggling with?" "Is what I am wearing going to be a factor that can move a family closer to being torn apart?" "How is this going to affect how I feel about myself?" "What kind of message does this outfit send about me?" Those thoughts may sound a little dramatic and most likely the average women doesn't think too much along those lines, but we need to start. I am not writing this post to offend, call out, or act like I know it all because I most certainly don't and we all have things we need to work on. I write this as a plea. I, myself, have gone through periods in my life where making sure I was dressing in a way that was always in line with how a virtuous daughter of God would dress wasn't the top of my priorities. It may sound silly, it may sound ridiculous, and it may even sound impossible, but do we as women realize how we dress, how we act, and how we present ourselves affects our society as a whole? Again, I don't write this to fire anyone up, to make people feel guilty or to place judgement on anyone. That is not my place and it never will be. I just have witnessed, seen, and even been affected first-hand by what pornography (whether it's a Victoria Secret commercial, or full on hard core pornography) can do to not only a person, but to all the people associated with that person that may be an addict or a potential addict. Families are being torn apart by this terrible addiction left and right. This addiction changes a person. Although pornography addiction affects both men and women, it is a much bigger problem with men. Unfortunately in our day and age it's not hard to become an addict. Back in the "good old days" it was much more difficult to see pornography. It was a matter of having to buy a magazine from a store, stealing one, or having someone else get one for you. Now days, it's an innocent click on the internet, flipping through channels on the television, or even walking into the mall. To many people, and even our society as a whole, the type of pornography that I am referring to isn't pornography at all. In fact, it is very much accepted and even glorified. My daughter is a dancer. She loves it. She loves to follow famous dancers on Instagram. I have looked at their profiles, seen them dance, and watched them on television. They are extremely talented, beautiful girls. What makes me sad is not only the way they dress both on and off the stage, but the seductive dance moves they are doing, music they are dancing to, and their parents loving everything about it. It is upsetting to me how desensitized our world is. These young 8-15 year old girls are already lead to believe that wearing less is beautiful. It isn't just the "hollywood lifestyle" that seems to accept this as ok. I took my daughter and her friends to a high school  football game one night this last fall. As I sat there by myself as she and her friends were off socializing, I didn't watch the game, I watched all that was going on around me. To be honest I was a bit sick to my stomach. Not only were extremely young girls wearing very short, tight, and low cut apparel, the way they were acting around boys, the things I could hear them talking about, and the way they presented themselves was heartbreaking. I remember that age and feeling like you wanted the boys to notice you and doing what you could to fit in somehow and be accepted. It is extremely hard. It doesn't ever get much easier. I think we, as adults, whether we're willing to admit it or not, are still trying to fit in. We all want a place in this world where we feel accepted, loved, and important. I know I do. I am the first to admit that I have always been more of a follower than a leader. Even though I have always had a desire to do the right thing, I was never strong enough as I was growing up to stand up for my beliefs if it meant I would have been ridiculed or ostracized. I was so worried about what everyone thought. That is where I found my self worth. If only I would have known way back then that that was the last place I would ever find it. If only we could get everyone to love themselves for who we are and who we were sent here to be. I know that is very wishful thinking, but just imagine how different our world would be!
   Going back to how we are choosing to dress, and all the trends that seem to be guiding our thoughts on what we will wear everyday is literally affecting our society in either a good, or a not so good way. I know you may be thinking, "how can what I wear be that big of a deal? It can't possibly affect others the way this lady is making it sound." I wish that were true. Unfortunately, it very much so affects everyone around you. The way you dress not only can have a negative affect on boys and men, but young girls or even other women that may look up to you. There are amazing, valiant, strong men that are succumbing to this epidemic addiction every single day. Men that are great husbands, fathers, leaders in their church, role models in society. It most certainly is a choice for them to be lured into this, but what are we as women doing to help it? I am not saying we need to dress in a nun-like fashion every single day. We can be extremely fashionable, trendy, and in fact (in my opinion) look the most beautiful when we are wearing modest, and tasteful apparel.
   Again, I don't write this to offend, judge, or call out anyone. I just can't keep quiet about it any longer. This problem is astronomical. It is taking down amazing men that we need. It is tearing families apart. It is lowering women's self worth. It is sending a message to our children that it is how we are accepted and valued. I know this won't make much of a difference, as I don't even know that 2 people read this thing. But if by chance you are reading it, I am pleading with women everywhere to please stop and think about it. Again, I may sound crazy, obnoxious, or whatever but I have seen this affect way too many people that I love in a negative matter, including myself and my own children. If anything, just consider my plea. We, as women, were sent here to do an AMAZING calling. We are mothers, daughters, teachers, role models, and have the power to do so much good.