Back to school!!!!
I left off at the end of Koleman's first grade year when I took a detour. So I am going to go back a little bit.
When J left for North Dakota, I think I mentioned in that post, Koley didn't really struggle with it. I also have mentioned, that he has always been a mama's boy. He just prefers me to do everything for him over anyone else. I think that is pretty common with most kids and their mom's. He would actually have a hard time when J would come home. Not because he was home, but because our routine and schedule would change a bit. For example, I would have J run them to school sometimes, or we would do different things together.
He got my amazing friend Julie for second grade. I was so happy!! He had a good year with her. However, he seemed to be secluding more and more. The previous year, he would at least eat in the lunchroom. In second grade he started eating in her classroom and then would go to the special ed room to play on the computer for recess. I was a little worried that he was loosing valuable learning experiences not being around his peers during unstructured times. He would also choose to go to the SPED room for his recess time. I mentioned to Julie that I would like to try and have him go out for at least one recess a day. She was really good about it and honored my request. He HATED it. Even though he would be outside he would sit against the wall or go sit under a tree and read or play his DS (yes, I said DS. Terrible I know). He was allowed to have it certain times of the day. It is really like his security blanket. Even though having J gone wasn't a huge issue for him, our schedule was crazy. It was a consistent schedule for the most part, but crazy! We would have to wake up early most mornings because I had a class at 7:40. The kids would go to my day friend's house those mornings and she would take them to school. Then twice a week at night they would have to go to my mom's or another friend's house while I had another class. Between my school, their school, Addie's dance, scouts for Koleman, homework, etc., we were always running. Koleman did Ok after he got used to it. At first, however, he really struggled. He would have more and more melt downs. He never wanted to go anywhere unless we had to. And he just wanted to isolate most of the time.
As he finished second grade and it was the summer before 3rd, that is when things were beginning to take a turn for the worse. Koleman does not like change very well at all. And there were definitely a lot of changes going on in our lives. With J being gone, having to move in with my parents, and dealing with a mom that was not functioning the way she should be. I was amazed how well he handled all that was going on. Heavenly Father was certainly watching out for him and helping him work through things. But because of those things that were going on, he had the opportunity to isolate. Even though that is what he preferred, it wasn't good for him. I feel like, socially, last summer caused a huge regression for him.
Another thing that Koleman was doing more and more of was making a lot of different hand movements. A lot of the time it is referred to as "flapping" in autistic kids. He isn't very coordinated with his motor skills. He has no desire to learn to ride his bike, tie his shoes, and still doesn't like to write. It didn't help that he had a mother that was out of commission for nearly that whole summer and even before I found out about J's affair, I was always so busy. No excuse at ALL. I was honestly just trying to keep my head above water. But looking back, I regret not taking more time specifically for both of my kids.
It was August of last year and J had just returned home from North Dakota. School was about to start. Koley was not prepared like he should have been. We started off the year kind of rough..........
When J left for North Dakota, I think I mentioned in that post, Koley didn't really struggle with it. I also have mentioned, that he has always been a mama's boy. He just prefers me to do everything for him over anyone else. I think that is pretty common with most kids and their mom's. He would actually have a hard time when J would come home. Not because he was home, but because our routine and schedule would change a bit. For example, I would have J run them to school sometimes, or we would do different things together.
He got my amazing friend Julie for second grade. I was so happy!! He had a good year with her. However, he seemed to be secluding more and more. The previous year, he would at least eat in the lunchroom. In second grade he started eating in her classroom and then would go to the special ed room to play on the computer for recess. I was a little worried that he was loosing valuable learning experiences not being around his peers during unstructured times. He would also choose to go to the SPED room for his recess time. I mentioned to Julie that I would like to try and have him go out for at least one recess a day. She was really good about it and honored my request. He HATED it. Even though he would be outside he would sit against the wall or go sit under a tree and read or play his DS (yes, I said DS. Terrible I know). He was allowed to have it certain times of the day. It is really like his security blanket. Even though having J gone wasn't a huge issue for him, our schedule was crazy. It was a consistent schedule for the most part, but crazy! We would have to wake up early most mornings because I had a class at 7:40. The kids would go to my day friend's house those mornings and she would take them to school. Then twice a week at night they would have to go to my mom's or another friend's house while I had another class. Between my school, their school, Addie's dance, scouts for Koleman, homework, etc., we were always running. Koleman did Ok after he got used to it. At first, however, he really struggled. He would have more and more melt downs. He never wanted to go anywhere unless we had to. And he just wanted to isolate most of the time.
As he finished second grade and it was the summer before 3rd, that is when things were beginning to take a turn for the worse. Koleman does not like change very well at all. And there were definitely a lot of changes going on in our lives. With J being gone, having to move in with my parents, and dealing with a mom that was not functioning the way she should be. I was amazed how well he handled all that was going on. Heavenly Father was certainly watching out for him and helping him work through things. But because of those things that were going on, he had the opportunity to isolate. Even though that is what he preferred, it wasn't good for him. I feel like, socially, last summer caused a huge regression for him.
Another thing that Koleman was doing more and more of was making a lot of different hand movements. A lot of the time it is referred to as "flapping" in autistic kids. He isn't very coordinated with his motor skills. He has no desire to learn to ride his bike, tie his shoes, and still doesn't like to write. It didn't help that he had a mother that was out of commission for nearly that whole summer and even before I found out about J's affair, I was always so busy. No excuse at ALL. I was honestly just trying to keep my head above water. But looking back, I regret not taking more time specifically for both of my kids.
It was August of last year and J had just returned home from North Dakota. School was about to start. Koley was not prepared like he should have been. We started off the year kind of rough..........
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